Memo from Osama

Memo

To: All Al Qaeda Fighters

From: Bin Laden, Osama

Date: 16 October 2006

Re: The Cave



Hi guys - We've all been putting in long hours recently but we've really come together as a group and I love that! However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave, and frankly I have a few concerns:

1. While it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we should

be even more concerned about the dust in our cave. We want to avoid excessive dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we need to sweep the cave daily. I've done my bit on the cleaning roster - have you?

I've posted a sign-up sheet near the cave reception area (next to the Halal toaster/griller).

2. Its not often I make a video address, but when I do, I'm trying

to scare the hell out of most of the world's population, okay? That means that while we're taping, please do not ride your scooter in the background or keep doing the 'Wasssuuup' thing. Thanks

3. Food. I bought a box of Bega cheese slices recently, clearly

wrote "Ossy" on the front, and put it on the top shelf of the fridge.

Today, two of my Bega slices were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying.

4. I'm not against team spirit and all that, but we must distance

ourselves from the Infidel's bat and ball games. And please - do not chant "Ossy, Ossy, Ossy. Oi Oi Oi" when I ride past on the donkey.

5. Graffiti. Whoever wrote "OSAMA F**** DONKEYS" on the group toilet

wall, it's a lie. The donkey backed in to me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain.

6. The use of chickens is strictly for food. Assam, the old excuse

that the 'chicken backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain' will not be accepted in the future. (With donkeys there is a grey area).

Finally, we've heard that there may be Western soldiers in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them.

First patrol will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar and Dave.

Love you lots,

Group Hug. Os.


PS - I'm sick of having "Osama's Bed Linen" scribbled on my laundry bag.

This is.....

This is the day i've been waiting for.

Finally, after 2 years of service. i've finally see the light at the end of this long tunnel.

As i do not like to use OA to do goodbye e-mails.

I'll want to say, what i want to say, in here. even thou you guys might not have the chance to read it.

Firstly, to CPT LIM SHIOU LIANG (The previous OC) whom i was under his wing from July 06 - April 07.

You taught me a great deal of stuff, not only they will be useful in army, they will be useful in life too. i thank you greatly.

Secondly to CPT LOW MIANG HWEI (curent OC) whom i served from march07 - 18/04/08.

Your creativeness and those projects you injected to camp. i'll never forgot those.
I also wish to thank you, for allowing me to plan work accordingly and to fully wield whatever power i have in my own dept.

like you always said : everyone has his own part to play, and none is useless.

Thank you for being there when i needed you. (to sign documents actually. lol)

And may i take the chance to congratulate you on your new posting. =D

Thirdly is to : 2LT PARIGEPATI ANIRUDH REDDY (i insist on writting the full name)

yo. promoting to LTA soon rite? All the best to you in your remaining time in NS.


Next is to

2WO CHEONG CHEE KIONG

Sir, you taught me a lot , in work.

Can see that you are very knowledgeable.

Thank you for all the help given, and all the recommendation for me.

i'll always remember your teaching.


MSG TAK KIM TECK

Msg Tan.. Thank you for assisting me, and tolerate my staff when they piss you off. we've never been too close due to different dept. but i still respect you.

Huat ar!

1SG LI TIAN WEN / 2SG NEO TUAN AIK

Never had the chance to do Field work with you all. But still, wanna wish you guys all da best!

My dept Guys

LCP PRASAD S/O JEYAPRAGASAM
LCP DARRYL LEE ZHENG LIN
PTE CALEB TJONG SHENG

Guys.. wake up call already!

Prasad: thou u going to ORD soon. please take care of the 2 kids under you. They still have a lot to learn. Also, cut down on your MC.. lol.
And, please ensure that Caleb is equipted before handing over.
Other than that, try not to piss off msg tan or 2wo cheong.

Darryl: Haiz.. really dunno what to say.. try to control yourself. Other than that, you're quite a good worker. Picking up some of my habits, like finishing work early... and quite unfortunate.. sleeping in office. hahaha.

Caleb: i've nothing for you.. as you are also quite new. Try to pick up as much as possible from the two of them. Good luck in your remaining days in camp.

My Cohot people
CPL JIMMY SEE
CPL JEREMY LIEW
LCP YEO PEI CHONG

Jimmy - i'm glad we got posted together. it's been great working with you

Jeremy - stop that singing... sounds like crap. and stop chaokeng.

Peichong - Drift king! lol. still remembered all the crazy stuff we do together (oops). Keep in touch!


Other Dept pple

LCP CHUNG YUAN SHIN
CPL(to be) CHOO TZE KEONG
LCP TAN KAI MING DARREN
LCP ARVIN LIM


Ys/TK/Darren/ Arvin
It was fun knowing you guys. Glad that we have met. All the best to you all!

To those whom i missed out.
Camp wun be fun withou any of you. All the best! Keep in touch

Finally... to these 2 person

LCP MELVIN CHO (ah girl)
LCP EDWIN ONG

Melvin : don't come late already.... the next punishment would not be nice...

Edwin : still, no improvement i've seen. Stop dragging darryl to the toilet and chat inside there.. even if you are free, he got work to do.
This i am my own man attitude has to stop.


The last thing i wanna say to you guys is...





ORD LOH!

Promotion

LoL. got promoted like 2 weeks before ORD.

here's da new rank.

Bedok Motor spot event

I'm sorry that i din blog for ages..

computer was down for the whole of march, and i got hook to facebook after it came back.

LoL.

Here's a photo to reward you all.. it was from the event on title, where i was part of the work force .



Chio right.. i mean her tatto...what were you thinking?

Mugshot of tatto